Extreme Makeover: Cruise Ship Edition w/CM3K Part 1

Cruise Man 3000 is ready for some cruise ship demolition...
well, kinda...

In a recent interview I did with CruiseLine.com, I was asked if there were some features I'd like to put on a cruise ship in the near future. Not only did I have one or two things, but four came to mind. Since my interview with them last month a few others have come to mind and I thought I'd share them with ya to see if you'd like to join my demand team in hopes that one cruise line out there will hear our cry and supply the innovative goods! I mean it seems 'impossible' is no longer a word for cruise lines these days. Let's see, we have Imax/4D theaters, ropes courses (Carnival Cruise Line); decks that walk over the water (Princess Cruises); bowling allies, rappelling walls, salt rooms and ice bars (Norwegian Cruise Line); rock walls, surfing simulators, zip lines and skating rinks (Royal Caribbean International); and even water slides that go off the sides of cruise ships (Disney Cruise Line)! So what's next? I think a few of my suggestions! Now to all the cruise lines in the world, grab your pens and paper! On your mark, get set, call your designers!

My Cruise Ship Amenity Wish List

#1: A Non-Water Based Roller Coaster

Roller Coasters are the perfect fit for a cruise ship!

Photo Credit: Six Flags America

I have the biggest passion for heights, speed and a good shake along the way. So what better combination could there be to satisfy these loves than having a roller coaster on a cruise ship. If a cruise line were able to configure a way to do this, I would easily sail them with no questions asked. Now here's my 2 cents on this: I think it should be taken to a whole new level on a cruise ship! They should make it an indoor roller coaster with black lights everywhere making it a glowing, thrilling time! This way, it could still run should the weather not permit for it to function outside; plus it would be another cool thing for passengers to experience while at sea!

                                     #2: Laser Tag

Now how fun would this be while sailing
at 20 knots?
Photo Credit: Carlisles Sports Emporium             

Speaking of things glowing in the dark, lets get a laser tag facility aboard a cruise ship. My question is, why hasn't this already happened? Don't y'all think this would have been birthed on a ship around the bowling alley and rock wall era? I think this would be cool to be on two decks or so that may or may not have some kind of character theme (hint hint, NCL, RCI and DCL). Also, I think having some sort of inflatable, portable scene could also be to the cruise line's advantage. That way, you can play laser tag under the stars! This would be super cool  on ships that have nice open-air deck space like Norwegian Epic or Oasis and Allure of the Seas! I'd really think Disney Cruise Line could capitalize on this with Toy Story characters Zurg and Buzz Lightyear. But for some reason, idk why...I could definitely see Royal Caribbean hop all over this one! What do y'all think?

                                   #3: Bumper Cars

Bring the bumping action to the high seas!
Photo Credit: Gratuitous Geek

Keeping with things that could be enjoyed regardless of the weather... BUMPER CARS! Doesn't everyone love these things? If you don't, I'm sorry... you just weren't raised right. Don't be caught in front of me while driving one of these bad boys -- Bump Man 3000 will getcha LOL! Again, a character affiliated cruise line such as Disney, Royal Caribbean or Norwegian (hint hint) could really run with this idea. And with RCI running this new "Built for Wow" campaign, I again wouldn't put this pass them for one of the Sunshine class vessels coming to us in 2014 and 2015, respectively. BUT who knows, NCL may get dibs first? And to my cruise lines who already have vessels with ice rinks on them (RCI, hint hint), y'all can take this to a whole new level. BUMPER CARS ON ICE! Now that's really a "WOW" moment! 

Take the bumper cars experience to new, icy heights!
Photo Credit: Seattle Daily Journal of Commerce

#4: Bungee Jumping...off the Ship

Talk about thrilling, let's jump OFF the boat!
Photo Credit: 9 Lives Adventures

Now take a deep breath. I know what you're thinking. Some of you may think I'm a little crazy for this suggestion, but I think it would be super cool! In fact, this would be a cool shore excursion for those who aren't interested in doing something in port or for those who've been to their ship's current call before. I think they--whichever cruise line(s) do this--should somehow build a ledge that would go off the ship, sort of like a retractable portion of the deck that is sturdy and can withstand strong winds the top of the vessel experiences and have bungee jumping available for passengers only while the ship is in port, on the side of the vessel opposite to the dock. So who's with me? Huh? Huh? Huh? Any takers willing to sign "those papers" should a cruise line yield a vessel with the human rubber bands? For some reason, my gut says NCL would so be into this one!

So those are my suggestions for now. I've got 4 more cool ones coming your way next week in part 2's post! Be sure to tell me what you think of my suggestions and check back for more things I'd like to see on the high seas! You're cruisetacular for reading! Until we talk ship again--Shon!